Pop Vultures

I’m not one of those Brits who hates the Queen and thinks she’s a waste of good tax revenue. I reckon as heads of state go, we could do a lot worse than a kindly but intelligent old lady who is universally loved and recognised the world over. Nevertheless, I do find that when the BBC focuses on the Queen they can go a bit overboard with the cloying obsequiousness and forelock-tugging. Their latest foray into documenting her existence, Monarchy: The Royal Family at Work, is no exception.

The first episode focused on the Queen’s state visit to the USA, which took place this summer. You could tell that the BBC was relishing the ‘we’re so sophisticated compared to those uncouth Yanks’ angle, as they contrasted scenes of the Queen putting Annie Leibowitz in her place at the palace with scenes of lighthearted planning for the event going on across the Atlantic. In Virginia they kick their ‘Virginia’s Royal Welcome’ meeting off with a group rendition of I Feel Good. Oh, and they had t-shirts made! Bless their little colonial hearts. Meanwhile, back at the palace, equerries and ladies in waiting prepared for the trip by consulting ancient leather-bound protocol handbooks.

After the Queen’s visit to Virginia, and a quick stop at the Kentucky Derby, the action switched to the White House, and plans for the dinner being thrown in Her Maj’s honour. Inititally, I have to admit, it was quite good fun watching Barbara Bush agonize over whether the Queen would like the plates she’d picked out for lunch, and George Bush bitching about having to wear white tie (he’s a casual guy, apparently). But after the Bushes had, between them, mentioned about eleven times how important the ’special relationship’ is between the USA and the UK, I was getting a little fed up. I mean, please, of course they’re going to say that to a BBC film crew. They’re not likely to say ‘Oh, yeah, Britain, that tiny and inconsequential island. Wait, is that where this Queen woman is from?’ now are they?

Anyway, sorry, I’m supposed to be writing about the show, right? The show about the Queen. Well, I have to say, love the royal family or loathe them, this is fascinating telly with lots of intriguing little moments in it, like Prince Philip having to ask the Queen’s permission to leave an event, or the behind-the-scenes palaver created when the Queen accidentally walks the wrong way at a photo call. And BBC fawning aside, you can’t help but admire a woman who, at 81, is still out there doing public appearances morning until night, and managing to actually be polite and welcoming to everybody she meets. I’m 55 years younger, and I’m not sure I could do that.

The series continues next week with a state banquet back at Buckingham Palace, an investiture ceremony, and the Queen’s birthday parade. Honestly, if nothing else, it’s worth watching just for the hats.