Pop Vultures

Project Runway, S04 E12: Finale, Part 1

Previously on Project Runway: Sweet P made her last cute but commercial dress and was eliminated. The judges pretended that they couldn’t decide whether Rami or Chris should be eliminated and kept them both, under the condition that they’d have a runway-off, with only the winner making the top 3. Keep reading to find out who’s in.

The show begins with the final four seated before Heidi. Perched carefully on their stools, with Mistress Heidi looming above them on the runway, they rather look like naughty schoolchildren. I’m sure that, somewhere, there is fanfic that supports that idea. Heidi tells them that they’ll all be making a twelve outfit collection, with only Christian and Jillian guaranteed to show. If I didn’t know that the runners-up – including Sweet P – also show at fashion week (as decoys to avoid spoilers), I’d consider this an exercise in cruelty. As it is, it seems rather kind to give one of the decoys the same time and budget as the others, since they’ll be showing to the same crowd. Of course, it also prolongs their desperate hope that they might win the grand prize, but you can’t have everything.

Celebratory champagne on the rooftop naturally leads to fierce runway walking, although Rami looks more bemused than fierce. Christian interviews how fabulous it is that’s he’s made the top three, especially since he’s only 21. I should try to be understanding of his youth, really; if someone had been recapping me at that age, I’d still be trying to find every last written copy and burn it. I would take down the Internet, if necessary. Of course, compassion isn’t nearly as fun as snark, so I’ll pretend I didn’t have this flash of understanding.

Quick montage of all the designers leaving the apartment and heading home. Since three of them are simply going across town to their New York apartments, it’s rather lacking in drama. Cut to Tim, months later, knocking on Christian’s door (not a euphemism of any kind). Christian has the sort of apartment a 21-year-old aspiring fashion designer living in one of the world’s most expensive cities would have: in other words, a postage stamp. His studio/bedroom appears to have been a closet at one point, and he places a single mattress on the floor each night to sleep. Of course, he is about the size of a leprechaun, so it’s not too uncomfortable.

Christian’s collection is, as expected, interesting and full of unusual details. It is also in a surprisingly dull pallet and overwhelmed by too much…well, too much Christian, really. We’re talking feathered pants worn with a ruffled jacket, people. As Tim rightly points out, “It’s a lot of look.” Since Christian really, really wants to win, he actually seems to be listening to Tim’s advice.

Next, he visits Jillian, who lives in a much larger apartment with a view of the river. Apparently, Ralph Lauren pays well. Her collection looks very Jillian, with fabulous jackets inspired by 15th century armor. It turns out that Jillian liked the last challenge a whole lot. Her pallet is as dull as Christian’s, however.

Jillian invites Tim over to her family home in Long Island for dinner, and this may be my favorite scene from the whole season – even more than the wrestling divas! The father, a skinny, trucker-hat wearing dad type, is so thrilled to have Tim there that he says it’s even better than Santa Claus. I would vote for a combo deal: I think Santa should start delivering mini-Tim Gunns. It turns out her mom went to see a clairvoyant when she was younger and was told that she would have three children and one of them would be famous. Jillian agrees that she will be. Sure, everyone else says that, but for her it’s really true. She seems convinced that the limited Project Runway fame is not what the psychic was talking about, either.

On to Rami. Tim is driving through sunny LA in a corporate-sponsored car and arrives at Rami’s house, which looks like a lovely place. He introduces Tim to his two friends, who are clearly visiting Rami just so they have an excuse to meet Tim, since there seems to be no other reason for their presence. Rami’s back story is all about how doubtful he was about his interest in fashion, coming from an Arabic background, with its strict views on masculinity. But then his parents found out, and they were very supportive, and he knew it was what he had to do with his life. Not a whole lot of drama in that story, really. Lifetime is going to have to change it around a lot if they have any hope of finding a movie-of-the-week in that life story.

Tim and Rami head off to his studio in Silverlake, which is freaking huge, as you might expect from someone who’s already had some success in the business. There seems to be a bit of sniping this year about how Rami has a successful business and the competition should be about finding the next big thing, but I’m not convinced. I mean, he’s not breaking any competition rules by having a large studio, and Jeffrey (previous winner) was in a similar situation last year. The show rewards creativity, not prior success, and penalizing those with experience would suggest that it plays a larger role than creativity, and I don’t believe that’s true. As for whether or not Rami needs it less than the others is a judgment we don’t have to make, I think. Besides, it should be about the clothes, right? Hells yeah.

Rami’s collection doesn’t look very Rami at all. It’s based on Joan of Arc, but sadly more on her clothing than on her schizophrenic tendencies, which I suspect would be a far more interesting collection. Remarkably, he has many pieces that are NOT draped, and he’s created some interesting, if heavy, looks. Rami is also the first designer to get away from the “stormy weather” pallet, and though I love the cranberry shade, the goldenrod is a bit less winsome. Tim is worried that the collection is not as soft as he would expect from the draping guru.

Tim quickly flies back to New York to meet Chris and see his collection. Okay, there is a lot to say about his clothes, but let’s start with the big one: Chris has used human hair as a major motif.

It’s…original, to be sure. Tim complains that it’s triggered his gag reflex, and that’s about right. I mean, there’s nothing wrong with it. It’s not like Chris went out and scalped anyone himself (although the Locks of Love people are probably a bit pissy with him right now). And the visual effect is striking, to be sure. It’s just…it’s HUMAN HAIR. Not only do I not especially want to wear it, but I’d also be worried about shedding the whole time I wore it. I have enough trouble with the hair that’s already on my head. The fabulous Dan over at Tifaux said it seemed like a very Edward Gorey collection, and he got it spot on. The designs are a bit dark and twisted and gothic — and pretty damn hot, too — but I wonder how much the human hair is a gimmick, and I am very anti-gimmick when it comes to fashion.

They wander over to meet Chris’s friends, and even though this has nothing to do with the fashion at all, I have to include this cap of the his friend’s apartment. According to Chris, the guy has lived in the apartment for ages and spends all his time crafting baroque bits and bobs until the ENTIRE place looks like this:

Can we have a new reality show in which the nuttiest interior designs compete for prizes, please? We’ll call it If It Ain’t Baroque. It’ll be brilliant.

Later, the designers all gather at the hotel. Christian and Jillian are in a room with three beds, and Chris and Rami are in a separate room downstairs. They all have a happy reunion, and do seem to genuinely like each other, though Rami admits that he was wondering who would end up on the third bed.

In the workroom, there are only three tables, so Rami and Chris agree to share. Tim tells them that they’ll be presenting their three strongest looks to the judges that day and they will be working with a partner. Rami chooses Jillian, of course, and Christian and Chris are back together. After the expected frenzy of models, alterations, and freak outs about OMG human hair, it’s runway time!

Rami’s pieces show promise, and they are not at all what I would have expected from Rami. The blue coat is seriously overdone – a coat half that size would have worked perfectly – but let’s pretend this is the high fashion version and a more ready-to-wear one would make its way to the shops. The short dress is pretty, if a bit dull, and the gown works as an over-the-top fantasy. I’m not convinced that the three pieces work together, but I assume they are representative of aspects of the overall collection. Yeah, I’m guessing, here. At least there’s no goldenrod.

Chris describes his look as “glamour goth,” which seems just about right. There are so many things I love about these outfits. The skirt made out of safety pins should be in my closet, though I have no idea how I’d ever sit down in it. The lace top is gorgeous, and I love that the full-length gown uses crocheted hairpin lace. I think that it’s far more striking than Rami’s, but not as commercial – and not just due to the hair.

The judges love Chris’s look, though they are naturally dubious about the OMG human hair. They worry that he’s gone a bit over the top, both in design and in the model’s hair and makeup, but they praise his creativity and originality. They also seem to love Rami’s work. Nina, in particular, is thrilled that he did something other than drape. However, despite giving him so much grief over the past weeks about his draping, their universal favorite is his draped middle dress.

After the judges’ discussion, Rami is in, and Chris is out. I understand the reasoning – that Chris was too dark, too costume, too, well, creepy, for mainstream fashion, but it does seem like they played it safe by keeping Rami, especially when I don’t think he’ll win against Christian or Jillian. Still, Rami’s was a bit more refined, and Chris will be ok — he’ll probably find a whole new clientele amongst the goth crowd. Chris gets his second kiss-auf, and says his second very gracious goodbye. The show fades out on his last maniacal cackle of the season. Bye, Chris!

Next week: It’s the last episode! The final three show at fashion week and a new winner is crowned. Anyone want to take bets on who it will be?