Of course, the one week I need to take off is the same week the season finales start to air and the networks hold their upfronts. More on the latter later this week, but I can at least write a bit about the former. What to do when I’m so far behind that I have no hope of writing real posts on each show? TV haiku, of course!
Supernatural
Sadly, it turns out
My ESP is broken:
Dean did go to hell
Survivor
Which is more shocking,
The final vote, or the fact
The show is still on?
The Office
Did you cringe or laugh?
All hour, I couldn’t choose.
The season’s best ep.
America’s Next Top Model
The plus-sized girl wins!
This would only matter if
She won a career.
And a few bonus ones, for shows that kicked off their finales with the first of a two- or three-parter.
Lost
Oceanic Six
Clearly shown, though I still think
The baby’s a cheat.
House
Great mystery, but
Why did the show stoop to use
A cheap strip club scene?
Bones
Stalkers and Idols
And Eighties karaoke
Hard to go wrong there.
Your turn to 5-7-5 the last week of television.
The only reason this doesn’t rank higher is that no one is actually sure what it is. It seems like a monster. The pilot who was ripped from his cockpit in order to be an afternoon snack would certainly agree. Everyone who’s been dragged across some bumpy jungle terrain would also think so (after all, that’s got to chafe). But, in the end, no one knows whether it’s an actual monster, or a monster representing the island itself, and the island may or may not represent purgatory, a religious schism or the current US political parties. Its power to inspire fear comes from its unknown quality and its unpredictability. Unfortunately, on the days when the special effects department makes it seem like little more than a nasty storm, the fear factor is mitigated somewhat.